I might be overestimating my wisdom level, but one of the best gifts I have to offer is insight from 55 years on this planet. For the most part, I’ve been an observer—watching others and gaining perspective. I’ve also learned lessons from living my life.
In this way, I’m not different or unique. Everyone moves through life, gathering information. I’m just willing to share a bit of what I’ve learned because I think it will resonate with others. I’ve given it some thought and came up with six tidbits of advice for a happier, healthier life.
1. Don’t inconvenience yourself for others’ comfort
I know. I know. This first piece of advice sounds selfish, but hear me out. I used to let people walk all over me. But with age, I’ve learned that I control how others treat me by what I allow. I spent too many years changing my plans, giving up what I wanted, and doing things I didn’t want to do—all for people who didn’t appreciate my sacrifices.
These days, I no longer arrange my life around other people. I’m still considerate and pleasant and even compromising with people close to me, but I don’t inconvenience myself to ensure their comfort. Call it selfish if you want, but learning to take care of Number 1 has changed my life, and it can change yours, too. I was amazed at how much satisfaction I have received from voicing my wishes, saying ‘no,’ and not changing my plans to accommodate others.
2. Find your passion—pursue it and share it with the world
Everyone has a skill or some gift to share. And this unique talent usually makes you feel great inside. It’s something you do better than most people, and others look to you as an expert. Finding this personal superpower is essential for ensuring your self-growth and self-satisfaction. We all need that reason to push further, and we all need to know that we have a purpose.
If you’ve searched but not discovered your passion, don’t give up. It’s there inside of you. Try new things, and go to new places. Have experiences that take you out of your comfort zone, and your purpose and passion will emerge. If you have found your unique gift, share it freely. Nothing makes you feel as good as contributing, sharing, and seeing others enjoy your talents.
3. Ignore your haters
Take a lesson from Taylor Swift and just “Shake It Off.” Everyone has haters. You know—those people who, for some reason, can’t stand you. This disconnect might be a simple personality clash, and that’s okay. No one ever said we have to like everyone. We do, however, have to respect their decision to distance themselves from us. We should not see this as a personal failure. And we should not jeopardize our dignity and expend precious energy trying to make them like us. It is what it is. When you learn to ignore this group and focus your attention on the people who matter to you, your life will become much more enjoyable.
4. Speak up!
I used to let things build up inside me and work through conversations in my head that I would never actually have. Then I would think to myself, “Wow! I should have said that.” Now, I say what’s rolling around up there. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t try to be rude or initiate conflict. However, I do comment more on things rather than stay silent. Voicing your point of view, wishes, and beliefs is a liberating feeling—trust me.
5. Find your confidence and create an attitude
For whatever reason, some people get all up in their heads and overthink situations. This overthinking usually spurs doubt, and the doubt can negatively affect confidence. At this point, you’re in serious trouble, just walking around on eggshells, worrying about all of the ‘what ifs.’
If this situation sounds familiar, you need to find your confidence. I know. This task is easier said than done, but here’s a great tip—you develop confidence by always looking and feeling your best. Take time for health and beauty routines that make you feel great. Others enjoy being around positive people with vibrant personalities. Feeling and looking your best creates your attitude. By following this piece of advice, you can put yourself together, find your confidence, develop your attitude, and be that positive person others love.
6. Do not self-sabotage
Self-sabotage is an extremely harmful action. Think about it. If you are the one responsible for halting your progress and denying your dreams, no one else can help you. Sometimes when people are almost to a goal, they do something to prevent further movement because deep down, they feel they don’t deserve the success. Or, maybe they are subconsciously afraid of the changes this new development might create. With this mindset, people can unknowingly squash their dreams.
If you find yourself circling in a similar pattern, sit down and ask the tough question—why? Then make a list of reasons you deserve the progress you are gaining. Finally, take a deep breath and tell yourself it’s going to be alright because you are deserving and strong enough to handle the positive changes coming down the road.
That’s a wrap!
There you have it—six straightforward pieces of wisdom that can change your life for the better. I know they have certainly changed mine. Getting out of your comfort zone, finding ways to improve, and taking steps to implement these changes can be extremely rewarding.
For more articles by Marcy, visit her blog One Wise B
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